Here I am, today. Wow, that’s hard to look at, let alone put on the internet. But, we can’t know where we’re going unless we know where we are. And I want others to know this is possible, and find encouragement as I progress. So here I am today:
Whew. It’s been a few years since I let my health, and this site go down. I went through some of the toughest and most defining times of my life at the end of 2013, and got stressed out! I didn’t intentionally abandon real food or lower stress living principles, I just didn’t do them. I remember weighing in at 218lbs in August of 2013. That was the lowest weight I ever remember in my adult life. Today, I weigh 326lbs. My diet isn’t paleo or low carb. It’s caffeine, sugar, and anything that might promise a quick hit of energy. I’m not losing weight, I’ve been gaining it since I had a rough end of 2013. Tonight, April 17, 2015; I’m taking back my life. This has been brewing for a little while, anger, disappointment with myself slowly growing inside. Depression about where my life is, despair about how it seemed hopeless, even some denial about that despair. I have 316 days until I turn 30. If I don’t do this now, I’ll never do it. I’m not happy. I can’t do what I want to do, I don’t feel good, I don’t like where I am, and I don’t want to continue on this path. I’m not talking about food, I’m talking about relationships, education, dreams, exercise, work, everything. Who we are, the world around us, it’s all the product of our doing. So I’m going to do it differently. Today, I persistently commit to a low carb, high fat, whole food based diet. I commit to show up to CrossFit three times a week. I commit to actively pursuing my bachelors degree. I commit to investing in to people on a daily basis, being a friend, and helping the people around me develop. I’m feeling idealistic, and I want to commit to a hundred things, but I think I best keep it to those 4 for now. This won’t happen without failure, and I’m not committing to a failure free anything. I’m just going to keep doing those things, as often as I can. I sometimes look at things as black and white when in reality they are shades of gray. Not eating paleo for a day doesn’t mean I’m not paleo, and eating paleo forever doesn’t mean I am. I could use all the support in the world, so if you’re reading this let me know, check in on me, or ask me anything!
Until Next Time,